Blonde bombshell, brainless bimbos
by ThisIsBlue
Summary: "You know, you're starting to sound a lot like Scorpius now."  "Hey! His isn't true love! Who could fall in love with blond bombshell brainless bimbos?"  I flinched at the irony of it all. One-Shot


**Blonde bombshell, brainless bimbos**

**YAY! My first ever one-shot!**

**So this was just an idea that came to me long ago. Tell me what you think of it! Oh and the title, I know it's stereotypical, but that's just how the character is thinking it. Sorry if I've offended!**

**Disclaimer: I own not anything you recognize from here.**

The redhead ran from the Great Hall all the way to the Ravenclaw tower, startling the students as she pushed the out of her way. This sure was odd behavior for a prefect, especially a prefect such as her.

She raced up the familiar stairs, not bothering to pause and catch her breath or wave back to the people who were greeting her.

She brought herself to a stumbling halt right in front of the statue, panting slightly and then tapped her feet on the stone floor as if to alert it of her presence. Immediately it came to life and spoke in it's clear, deep voice that she had gotten well used-to over the years.

"_Think yourself as a Ravenclaw, you?_

_Then answer me this and I will let you through._

_What does man love more than life_

_Fear more than death and mortal strife?_

_What the poor have, but the rich require?_

_What the contented man does desire?_

_What misers spend and spendthrifts save,_

_And all men do carry to the grave?"_

She frowned and cursed. The one time she needed to get in there as quick as possible, the statue asked a hard one.

"Ummm…a heart?" she said after a moment of thought.

The statue repeated the question.

"Love?" she asked, already knowing that she was incorrect. As expected, the statue repeated the question yet again.

"A soul?"

Repeated.

"No money?"

Repeated.

"Themselves?"

Repeated.

"Ugh! There isn't anything of the sort! There is not- Wait! Nothing. Nothing! It's nothing!"

The statue silently moved aside and let her through. Not wasting another second, she hurtled into the Common Room and up the staircase.

**OoOoOoOoOo**

I cracked open my eyes a fraction of an inch, shutting them tightly once again as the bright light hit them. Why is it that whenever you're depressed for some reason, your life becomes absolutely pathetic? I mean, why did my head feel the need to ache right now of all moments?

I groaned and rolled over, screaming when I fell of the bed and onto the floor with a loud _thunk_.

Bloody freakin' ouch.

Thank Merlin no one else was in the dorm or I wouldn't have been able to cry and scream without being looked at pityingly.

Once I was done with wallowing in self-misery, I stood up shakily and trudged to the bathroom, cursing violently when I stubbed my little baby-toe on my dorm-mate's trunk. It hurt like a *insert proper word for female-dog* let me tell you. I swear life hates me right now.

I reached the bathroom finally, after another minute of swearing when I walked into a wall. While stripping out of my shirt, I poked myself in the eye. After steeping in the shower I realized that the hot water had run out. After stepping out of the shower, I realized there was no towel in the bathroom. After groping for my wand while shivering violently, I realized that I hadn't brought it in here with me. Wait, what's the deal with there being no hot water anyways? This is a magical school for James Potter's sake! Couldn't they have a never-ending supply of hot water? And the towels? They should be replaced magically! What's a girl supposed to do after a freezing shower? Wrap herself in a _non-existent_, warm, fluffy towel?

Having no other option but to wear my clothes without drying off, I did so, cursing my life and this state of depression. Then I crawled back to my side of the dorm, after tripping over a shoe and not bothering to get up. I went to my nightstand, looking for my wand to dry myself, and possibly conjure a hot tub to soak in (yeah right). However, my wand wasn't there. That didn't surprise me much since I knew that something like this was coming ever since I woke up…but didn't the 'falling from my bed' or 'stubbing my toe and smacking into a wall' or 'no hot water and towels' count as that 'something'?

Lord, I hated this.

I searched frantically (and angrily) in my robe pockets and quidditch robe pockets and school skirt pockets and pyjama pockets, but I didn't find my wand. I roughly pulled open my drawers and instead of finding that stupid stick that allows me to do magic, I found something else.

A picture.

And thankfully, it took my mind off my less-than-pleasing-morning for a few minutes.

It was a group photo of all of us, each person labeled in elegant writing, lounging under the beech tree on the edge of the Great Lake. There was J_ames S. Potter _on the far left, smiling cheekily at the camera as he tossed a neon-pink colored Fanged Frisbee to _Fred A. Weasley, _who shoved it behind his back when he noticed _Lucy P. Weasley_ turning his way with a strict face. Next to him sat an over enthusiastic _Dominique A. Weasley _throwing a Quaffle to _Lysander F. Scamander, _who saw and dodged it at the last second, making _Lorcan X. Scamander _the target instead. Beside the strawberry blonde girl sat _Rose J. Weasley, _smiling prettily,with her hand in _Scorpius H. Malfoy's _hair, whose head was resting in her lap. His eyes were shut, but he opened them to peek at the camera, grin, and close them once again. In front of the Malfoy sat _Albus S. Potter _who winked at the camera as he caught and released and re-caught the Golden Snitch, not noticing that _Roxanne A. Weasley _was about to grab it from him until it was too late. _Amanda G. Longbottom _laughed at the two's play-fight while helping a tiny _Molly D. Weasley _levitate a feather._ Hugo H. Weasley _was playing a game of Wizarding Chess with _Frank K. Longbottom _who was looking very disgruntled at his obvious defeat. Next to them sat _Lily L. Potter_, above who hung _Louis P, Weasley _upside down from a branch of the tree, tugging at the Potter's long red tresses. Annoyed, she stood up in a flash, whipped out her wand at pointed it at his head. A flicker of fear passed over his upside down face before both of them burst into fits of laughter, and he, unable to keep his hold on the tree, fell, dragging her down with him.

I smiled ruefully at the picture, wondering where those days had gone. I was very happy then, wasn't I? Right now I wasn't, so why was I adding salt into my wounds by looking at it? This was exactly why I had removed it off my dressing table. Furiously, I threw it back into the drawer and flinched when I heard the sound of breaking glass.

Crap, I'd broken the frame.

Gently, I picked up the picture, the frame and the shards of glass, cursing yet again when the glass pierced the skin of my thumb deeply enough to hurt. I stood up to dispose of the glass, and let out an angry growl when I knocked over the waste-bin.

Clearly, today wasn't a good day for me. Which is exactly why, when a tiny, overactive mass of scarlet and golden burst into my dormitory, I uttered a sarcastic "Come to join the party, have you?" and then went back to throwing the contents of the waste-bin i had tipped over back into it… though I think I was making it worse by throwing so violently.

She analyzed me with a frown, waved her wand so that the rubbish would go back in the bin and then indicating for me to sit by pointing at me and then pointing to my bed.

I obeyed, knowing that it would be fruitless to argue with this one.

"I just gave up a beautiful morning for you, ran a million flights of stairs for you and embarrassed myself for you and you can't even say a nice 'good morning' to me? Wow, I didn't know it was this bad."

"I thought you came to help me Lil, speaking of which, how are you here anyways?"

"You know Rosie? Anyone can enter the Ravenclaw Common Room if they have a fully functional brain. I've been here many times, and I can honestly say that the statue has upped its level a bit and is finally asking questions that are actually hard."

"Wow. Yay to less intruders entering Ravenclaw." I said drily.

"Aw, cheer up Rosie. It can't be that bad." She said, throwing herself into my bed, lying on her stomach and facing me.

"Oh, but it is."

"Ok. Seriously, what happened?"

"Scorpius dumped me." Even saying it made my heart clench painfully.

"WHAT?" my red haired cousin stood up, anger radiating off her in fierce vibes.

"No. Don't panic, hear me out first."

I knew that she was itching to go find the guy who she almost considered a brother and tell him a choice of words and jinxes, but out of loyalty to me, she stayed, her gaze still burning holes through the door.

"Please Rose; tell me why exactly I am sitting here instead of showing Scorpius Malfoy that it isn't only my mother who is known for her Bat Bogey Hexes?"

"Because he has a valid reason."

"Yes?" she asked skeptically.

"He loves someone else."

"Oh? So wanting to sleep with some slut is a valid reason to dump my cousin?" she asked me huffily. Why did we Weasley/ Potters have to be so good with sarcasm?

"He doesn't want to sleep with a slut. He's genuinely in love with another girl."

"Why are you defending him? He doesn't deserve it! You didn't deserve to be dumped! I swear I will-"

"Lily. He's in love and he's right. He's in love with the right girl for him."

Seeing the look of pain on my face, she relented and sat back down, plopping her head in my lap.

"Come on Rose. Nobody is better than you. It's probably one of his blond bombshell brainless bimbos. He'll be back with you in no time."

I knew that was far from the truth, but just to please Lily; I nodded and managed a wobbly smile.

"Ooh! A picture!" she exclaimed suddenly, "Showmeshowmeshowme!"

I handed her the picture and she examined it with dancing eyes, "Aw! Molly looks so cute! And look at James and Fred. Cocky as ever. I miss those two. And Merlin! Is that how Dom's hair looked like before she got those highlights? I couldn't even remember! But blue suits her. And you and Scorpius look so cute!" she gushed, still thinking that me and Scorpius would be back together within the week. If only she knew.

"And Roxie and Al should still be best friends! They are the best together!" She continued. Merlin, it takes little to excite this girl, isn't it?

"They aren't the only ones…" I said smugly, pointing at picture-her and Louis.

She blushed, "Yeah, Louis is the best. I swear I would marry him if we weren't cousins. Merlin, I wish we weren't cousins."

"You know marriage between first cousins _is _legal here…" I said, glad that she was distracted from the 'Rose and Scorpius' topic.

"I know, but it doesn't seem like the right thing to do. I don't even know if he likes me," she said sadly.

"Hey. Who knows? Maybe you're meant for someone else." Who knows? Me, of course.

"Anyways, guess what." She said, bright once again.

"What?"

"I'm in love."

"You know, you're starting to sound a lot like Scorpius now."

"Hey! His isn't true love! Who could fall in love with blond bombshell, brainless bimbos?"

I flinched at the irony of it all.

"Scorpius Malfoy of course, since he's one himself!" she answered herself, laughing madly, as if it was something as funny as James Potter drunk on the night of his NEWTs. And the way she laughed was so… different; loud, full chortles, hiccups in the right places, tears leaking from her eyes. Sometimes I think she does this to make me start laughing at her… to cheer me up. And it always works.

"Lily, what would I do without you?"

"Dig yourself a grave and go die in it." She said matter-of-factly. "Now let's get out of here. It's a beautiful Saturday morning and both of us need to hunt for boyfriends."

"Exactly. Louis is being a loser and isn't following the _family before friends _rule, so who cares about him anyways?

"What? He's siding with Scorpius? He's definitely in for it now." She mutters darkly.

"Hey Lily? How are you always so happy? When you're not displaying your angry outbursts, that is?" I ask her out of genuine curiosity… and to get her mind off beating the shit out of Louis. Because she's perfectly capable of doing so. A Ginny Potter in the making.

"I'm not. I just pretend that I am, and then I get into the mood, and actually become happy. Until I remember that I was just pretending." She says with a smile that I had never before seen on Lily: a fake one.

"That's how good I've gotten at it." She says, then smiling brightly, "Anyways, let's go!" she said, taking my hand and pulling me off my bed and to the door.

**OoOoOoOoOoOo **

The two girls made their way down the stairs to see none other than the one and only, Scorpius Malfoy, lounging lazily on a blue couch, smirking at something Louis had just said.

A slight tinge of red came over Lily's cheeks as she saw her blonde, part-Veela cousin, but out of loyalty to Rose, she didn't wave or even acknowledge the presence of the two boys. Plus, she was currently pissed off at both of them.

The boys' conversation halted when they noticed the two girls. An awkward silence took over the Common Room, only broken by the sounds of their own thoughts.

Louis was thinking about how he should have had taken Rose's side rather than Scor's, because being his best mate, Scor would understand that he could never turn his back on his family. Scor would definitely forgive him. Rose undoubtedly never would. And of course, Lily would hate him too. Not to mention Dom, Roxie, Lucy and the ever-loyal-to-his-sister Hugo. Maybe the rest of the Potter-Weasley males wouldn't hate him once they knew the real reason Scor had broken up with her. Just like Rose didn't hate Scor because she knew the real reason. He averted his eyes from the two ladies guiltily.

Scorpius, however, did not bother to hide the fact that he was staring at the two redheads. His gaze followed them to the exit of the Common Room, wondering whether he had made the right choice or not. He had had an awesome time with Rose. Ever since he had started dating her, back in fourth year, he had become even more a part of the Potter-Weasley-Family than when he had been when he was best mates with Louis. By the time he started sixth year, he was practically part of the family. And that was when he started noticing the faults in her. There was nothing wrong with her per se; she was all a guy could ask for; pretty, intelligent, modest, caring and equipped with an active sense of humor. Rose was perfect for Scorpius, but alas, Merlin has twisted ways; Rose wasn't _her_.

He sighed regretfully; maybe he had made a mistake. _No. No, I couldn't have had. Look at her. I definitely did the right thing_.

Lily was pretty sure that one of the two boys (if not both) were staring at Rose and her. A pleasurable feeling swept through her at the thought of it being Louis. But she wouldn't speak to Louis for at least a month. Same to Scor. In fact, she was ready to go and give them a piece of her mind, and maybe a few hexes. How could he have dumped her? And what the hell was Louis thinking taking his side? Sure, they were best mates, but friends can _never _come above family. How could they do that to Rosie? How could _he _do that to her? She really should go and kick Scorpius' ass…

And Rose? Rose had just one thought in her head. One brief, simple thought. She was thinking that there _was_ someone better for Scorpius Malfoy than Rose Weasley and that that someone was the _complete _opposite of one of Scorpius' 'blonde bombshell, brainless bimbos'. Yes, Scorpius was right. Lily was the one for him.

**OoOoOoOoOoOo**

**So what did you think? I am a Rose/ Scorpius and a Lily/Scorpius shipper, so this was a bit hard for me.**

**Review and tell me how my first one-shot was :)**

**Those of you waiting for an update on Potter Totter, it's coming soon!**

**Much love, **

**~=TMs'M=~**


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